The Paths of Him Through Her Maze

Preface:

A poem to explain what it may feel like to fall in love from a perspective of a man that believes love is the greatest thing anyone can ever experience. The beginning goes from the perspective of seeing a woman as a challenge, then trying to solve her difficulties by being and doing greater things, realizing that their feelings of grandeur are in many ways an illusion though believing in them anyway. They feel when they love her they find all they ever felt as the meaning to life which they see is love and friendship with their only explanation or description of this emotion as being divine.

Which they feel free with her though realize that it's because of her they feel like this and allow her to take them away from their emotional hardships, which they feel she sees them as nonexistent and temporary while they trust her infinitely. They see all their trials and difficulties then as complete adventures and opportunities realizing they in their audacity never encountered the hardships others around them less fortunate may have gone through. Which the times she gets disappointed and needs time to think about him and her are the most difficult moments he can experience. For when she leaves him he feels a pain harder than when they were together. Though when he falls in love again it makes it all worth it, feeling as if he's victorious again and the victories make the failures worth it all just to be in love again.

You saw her like a maze,

Where all the bends and turns lead to greater places.

For on hopeful words we make our mark and all passion leads to grace.

When we trust that the greater the trials the loftier the rewards.

For when she touches you, you feel like you're free.

To reach for all and everything while grasping at greater than even you can see.

The adventure is in the struggle and no battle seems un-winnable and no hardship seems unconquerable.

Indomitable and driven by a will to believe and fathom the beauty and the sheer audacity of it all.

To gather brilliance as if it seems to call your name to reach her, transformed by what inspires you to grasp at the triumphant and still be humble enough to feel the way she moves you to the core of the depths of it all.

Finding the endless warm and feeling endlessly warm enough to touch the face of sheer divinity and see life itself as a lover and as a friend.

To ride dreams for whatever may come and see it through as if inspired by the present which the future guides to greatness feeling warm and hopefully inspired as if gracefully free.

To sing on at the outside of freedom's door and have her take you in from the rain.

You have hope that hope will carry me to and through the shadows of hardship when she sings my way through the trials, like she never knew me to struggle at all in some sweet, perfect adoration in love.

Lost in some sweet wilderness yet never take it more than some adventure that she carries me through.

Never to face the thorns and thickets of misery and trial wrought with gall and brine we struggle to avoid, tasting clear air and fresh water from where she leads us through.

To never taste the sting of loneliness and sorrow until we miss her and we see her gone.

In this there can be no hardship greater and no trial loftier than to love her just to have her fall away.

Though this is the battle we all yearn for and live for so we can have another chance to show we're a hero as courageous as a lion to see her love through.

For when we can call ourselves victorious only when we can be the victor of her love, indomitably passion worn by the struggle we carry to just see her another day.

All the hopes You held

All the hopes you held.

They ran as wild children made wild by the wilderness they ran through.

For you believed as if hopeful and hopefully inspired by youth you ran.

Clutching at places not long to replace the place you hold so reverently hallow.

In this what you see as beautiful and young in spirit is what doesn't escape my hopes as you age though unwillingly.

There is a place we all hold as sacred in us we run to like children that play until the daylight goes away.

In this we're hallowed by the core of where we find grace, and beauty and youth and innocence.

Knowingly we're aged well when we think we age like we've never been old and only aspire to be young.

Which is an impossibility though we like to see ourselves as if we've never aged at all with all the vigor and hope of youth.

In turn we see ourselves not as who we could be but who we wish ourselves to be and become more as who we wish we are imitating that which inspires us further to be inspired.

For we recollect not as we necessarily see ourselves to be though as we know we can be if we recollect how we choose to behave as if children and youth made wiser through the years.

This is truly the secret to never seeing ourselves as old or washed up by the weight of pain and hardship made harder by trial and age which breaks us down.

For recollecting all the beauty of that which inspires and makes us yearn for greater grabbing at dreams along the way, that's what makes us greater and greater eventually seeing ourselves as great from the eyes and opinions of others.

In this you dream never to lose sight of that which makes me have an opportunity to see joy and passionately led freedom in the air which causes me question everything yet not necessarily know what I ask or have asked.

As love falls on the way of those that seek out wisdom in knowledge and others see us as brilliant when truly we're just playing in a sea of life and information that gives us more than we are ever able to fully understand.

If I am ever to be able to see as greater it's not through hardship and misery wrought along the path you bury it's by finding joys in between the pains and trials that convince me to find some sort of value in it all.

The Faithful Atheist

You saw it like a mazes of infinite shadows.

And where they ran was infinitely warm.

Made warm by shadows that were infinitely warm.

Though not one confused touch ever felt too warm to bear.

As she touched me I felt warmer than I've ever been.

Like life flew into my bones from skin that felt life itself.

I think that's why I could never feel less than alive with her.

My darling that never touched me in a way that ever made me feel cold.

For when she dreamed of how I felt I couldn't tell her.

It was like a maze of feelings I just could not find a pattern to.

I just know she never made me feel like I could ever be less than warm.

Though I always felt like I had an answer to it all, then I'd find it lacking.

Words that she confused more than the confusion it took to make them.

To try to understand how someone so beautiful could be so inexplicable.

I think that's why I confuse myself when I try, stumbling on words I don't understand.

From feelings I can't ever find a way to fully explain.

Though I know she loves one who gives an honest effort.

Honestly effort is all I have to try to understand her.

For who she loves is like a shadow as we only see it when it's gone.

And to inexplicably try to understand is rather hallow.

As you're really grabbing at feathers of angel's wings blown away.

When really the only angel I've ever believed in is in her.

For life could never make anything more fair or beautiful to me.

Though some supposed ideology of god in her you could never question, when she in herself carries her life as more divine than some majesty was ever supposed to be to me.

In this you think you have faith as faith is really just believing in beautiful to me.

For her I feel if she continues to follow what she knows to be good I would never see her as anything but beautiful.

In this you think my faith is inexplicable because I have no faith in God but in her I see God and have faith.

For she is in faith in good as following what I know as beautiful in faith though God exists not outside of her or I though in ourselves and this is why I am an atheist on the outside though also a striving saint when it comes to how I choose to act or behave.

I think there's no better way to believe in perfect good and no other way to never be let down.

The Way You Dream I Was Dreaming

The way you dream I was dreaming,

She found me like she needed me.

I lost my eyes in skies that never quite knew the sunrise.

And dreamed of lies that never quite knew her eyes.

Until she told me to wear a disguise until these lies die.

She stole my grief and everything which consumed me like a thief.

Until not even words could find their way to pain she didn't write.

For write they must until she took even those lies away.

And pain it never had a pen to decipher these thoughts between these ears.

Upon paper that never could understand what was written on couldn't help it.

When we look at things that can cause us to relieve our grief as more than human.

For words mean nothing unless they can heal you by inspiring you to not break in two.

If then really the lie means more to me than her own ability to heal me I think I'm just lying to myself.

I think that's why you live two lives, one of which I never knew and one of which I always wanted to.

For if we can lie to ourselves to be next to her which she never knew why we didn't fully tell the truth you think that means more than lying to make her love us.

If this means you must hide all words for her to understand the way you feel you must!

For when she digs them out of me one at a time, she'll see I'm not just human I am healed as well.

In this you think it's not the way we feel which defines us, it's the way she feels as we feel the way we feel with her.

There can be no greater way to be than the way she makes us to be.

In this we hope she's more beautiful than what we don't understand and greater than what we never could.

For the limits of our dreams define the extent we see her to be and in limits there is no greater thing in our minds.

Then maybe the problem isn't with our dreams it's with our inability to be loved by one who sees our dreams.

In this you hope and believe her to be greater than you can ever see or hope her to be.

Knowingly I'll never know her and I think that's why I'll be forgotten to even myself.

Though if she can still feel the way I want her to feel for me maybe there's hope after all?

A Pondering of Love

She looked to me like I was greater than I was.

Then she said I'll run and you follow after.

She was talking about her life.

So I took these legs of mine carried by her upon the weight I carry and followed after.

You never knew how I could run so fast and so far yet her hope for me was all I knew to understand.

That's why you had dreamed this was more than just a dream to be forgotten.

For I can still dream of the taste I dream of her hope upon my lips.

A hope I never knew existed until it hit me like it never wasn't real.

So you had run faster than even I could recollect looking back to feel the taste of summertime upon my lips.

For joy is how I know her and nothing could be more joyful than ever thinking I did.

When all I recollect are disjointed memories pieced together by facts and everything makes me smile.

I think that's why she loved me so for it never mattered what we had necessarily done just that it made us happy in the end.

For she told me we have to carry each other when one falls and the other can carry on as nobody can ever walk alone and nobody can ever walk forever.

Then I realize it's not the days I don't remember that are just happy because they are, it's the days that are happy because I don't remember them not being any other way.

You never had a childhood you can remember not because you choose to forget it willingly but because it's not worth remembering.

So you write as if you see things like a child would because you never had a chance to see as a child would, simply happily.

I think that's why she told me to run with her because she never felt so willing to remember the way her childhood felt so innocently joyful than with me.

I guess when we're children we never realize how hard it is to run so fast and so far.

You believe that's why we never think we couldn't and that is why we have to be so carefree and seemingly reckless to do great things.

It's because a happy child really doesn't know what it's like to be afraid and I think she longed to feel innocent again and I longed to feel like I never wasn't.

I know that's why when I think of her kissing me I know it's not a lie and in some ways you think it always was.

Infinity and Life Itself

On will and valor's embrace you have favored from the paths you choose to tread you reached for all that blesses on the path of life you walk.

Yearning for all that you could ever wish to have and you wished that blessing could have my hope embraced in its favor, favorable to where you choose to walk.

Conundrums we have carried and continue to carry as riddles that we search out answers to that we wish favor and time to rip apart, blessing us in its destruction their eventual annihilation.

We search out grace like wise men made wiser by finding greater ways to lose agony and that which agonizes us, paining us to feel it break and joyfully to watch it go.

Making smaller riddles from the ashes of our understanding and breaking them to make even their mysteries disappear more in the ashes our understanding rises above like life itself.

Truly there is no greater way to grow and grow greater than breaking that to pieces that which causes us to sink.

For tower and fortress spawns greater and life itself continually becomes greater than it was.

As the only delay to life's continued growth is time itself and time cannot destroy that which only needs time to become greater.

Such greatness it is to watch life itself carry us to greater and greater places when we are just a speck in a sea of the grand existence of life itself.

In this the ones that lift everyone and everything living higher and higher are greatest as life itself lifts those that lift it greater itself.

In this there's nothing greater than the life that lacks nothing though needs nothing from life itself though that infinity is limited by the definition of infinity.

For life that lives as if it's infinitely sufficient is impossible as life requires life to be sufficient.

Which this is the illusion of virtue and the illusion it must require for life to exist as it sees virtue as perfectly attainable perfection.

When really there are only limits to perfection at the extent of what defines its greatest limit.

Which is truly the only explanation of infinity that we can conceptualize which is the greatest thing we can articulate without missing that which makes it seem lesser.

As we'll never truly understand anything fully as the perfect definition of understanding something is to perfectly understand what also it's not.

In this we can never truly and fully understand concepts such as virtue, love and life because in understanding their greatness to see it as we imagine it to be we also realize how we can never fully imagine it to not to be.

Then to understand one thing perfectly you have to spend your entire life experiencing the things it never is assuming we also learn by experiencing as much as we learn by thinking.

How great people never are destroyed by all that is not great they must rise greater than to become great that is a mystery in itself.

You think that is why great people believe in good things because that is what keeps them good.

There is nothing greater than a great person that is greater than what they choose not to be.

In this everything they struggle against is their enemy and that is everything that prevents them from being great.

In this you think we are ultimately fighting an impossible battle as greatness and life is the only thing worth dying for and the definition of life is to live and the only way to truly understand what life is, is to understand what it's not and in this the only way to experience what life is not is to die.

Of Sand Castles and the Dreams that Make Them Rise

Explanation:

A man feels he loves a woman unconditionally who he dreams about daily. He imagines what it's like to love her and be loved by her knowing he's just imagining her. He thinks of her like paradise and every second with her like freedom, knowing that it's just a dream he has. Which really he thinks is why someone in love can feel like it's paradise when it's actually just living each day for a dream they are trying to someday attain. He believes if he works harder, he'll be able to own the life he wishes to have for her when he's someday with her. He believes when that happens it will feel perfect and like building sand castles itself on a beach it will of course be transitory. Which is really the nature of love he feels because people believe in perfect love as unfailing when in actuality it can be fairly fickle. Then he culminates the thought with the realization that love can be perfect between two people if they never actually see it as failed even though someday it very much might. This is the illusion we believe in that convinces us to dream of outlandish things when in actuality it's the only reason we work for things and the only reason we ever believe there's anything greater. This is proven by the fact the narrator is actually alone this entire piece and what he feels is in fact an illusion.

Of Sand Castles and the Dreams that Make Them Rise

It's worth it the way she makes me feel it so.

Enough to grasp at dreams and dreamers yet still feel touched.

In her I give it all away and gain it all back again when she loves me more.

Though she's just a dream I dream of her love more.

Someday we'll be free my darling to walk the beaches of our paths made below us.

As we walk upon promises that dreams we felt could eventually carry us to.

Though will and sheer effort until all that crumbled to get us here is like sand beneath our toes.

Paradise could not be more fitting for her and it's only what I'd ever wish to give.

I think that's why I feel so free when I think of her.

For how else could I say I'd be able to enjoy this beach alone?

If not for the dreams I have of her that I could never have but by dreaming.

I think that's why we can feel so joyfully warm when we think of such a lonely place.

For it's not the salty waters nor the peace of the ocean's kiss on shoreline which makes me want to be here.

It's the sound of imagining her heartbeat in sync with waves that brings me back to thinking of her again and again.

Knowing that nothing could be more comfortable or joyful than the way she makes me feel when she feels at perfect peace with me.

That is why I work and work more so someday when I meet her maybe her and I could have a beach.

For what's more fitting than a private place where we can feel the world together?

As someday we'll watch the waters turn and wash away the sand castles and lofty mountains we make together.

Though nothing could ever take the love we made in making it.

Because deep down we're still like children making skyscrapers and cities we think will never fall.

Funny how the greatest things people think they create in their own eyes are those they never actually see fall.

In this our love may actually be perfect as we never see what we both made eventually fall as we'll both be gone before it goes.